Top 7 Alternatives to Snow Grit
Recently, the UK has been blanketed by heavy snowfall, with some areas seeing more snow than they have in 50 years. Over the holiday season, the snow was welcome by most, and why not? A white Christmas is a beautiful thing, but now the snow is causing some major problems, especially for drivers.
Worsening the situation is the fact that a lot of local councils are in short supply of grit for the roads. (Didn’t this happen last year? And practically every year before that?) This has meant that rubbish collection is sporadic (if it occurs at all), thousands of people haven’t been able to make it in to work and schools have been closed. Admittedly, that last one probably wouldn’t be viewed negatively by the children of the United Kingdom.
The grit shortage has got me thinking though.Some alternative materials to replace the missing grit must exist to help the councils see us through this snowy winter weather. In fact, here’s a list of my Top 7 grit replacements, just because I’m helpful like that:
1. Cat litter - Sure, this stuff is great for when Fluffy has to empty out last night’s mystery mackerel in jelly, but throw some of this down and you’ll be on your way before you can say “I can has cheezburger?“
2. Crunchy nut cornflakes - A bowl of these crunchy morsels is just the thing to kickstart your day, but be sure to set aside an extra bowl for the front drive to help give you that extra traction you need. WARNING: This method might attract people know as “Crunchy Nuts”. Be sure to clear them from under your wheels before setting off, or you’ll have more problems than just ice and snow.
3. Belly button fluff - Everybody’s got loads of this stuff just lying around being useless, so why not sprinkle liberally in the required areas? It’s super-absorbant!
4. Frozen Yorkshire puddings - You know how it is when you’ve planned a traditional Sunday roast and once again you’ve bought way too many of these edible hockey pucks.Fear not! Simply empty your freezer of the surplus puds and shove ‘em under your wheels.Well done, Aunt Bessie!
5. Gunpowder - You heard me right. Gunpowder. Spread this “wonder grit” all over your street, set it alight, then stand back and watch all the neighbours come out and phone the police.
6. Stale bread - We’ve all got this in the cupboard. There’s nothing like a little dried out seed loaf to provide a grippy surface for your woefully inadequate snow tyres. (May not work in seaside towns. Them seagulls be HUNGRY!)
7. Broken glass - A solution well-suited to highly-populated urban areas and any region with a proliferation of chavs. This one’s a no-brainer really. Excellent traction and one or two punctured tyres; what more could you ask for.Hey, you gave it a shot…it’s not your fault you still can’t make it to work.
As luck would have it, helpful advice is in abundance on the Internet if you choose to seek it out. The AA always offers some great common sense tips, and even air travellers can find handy tips from some of the UK’s aerodromes like the recommendation to use undercover Liverpool Airport parking.
If all the councils across this fair land would simply take note of the above list, this country could be running smoothly once again.The best thing about all this is that when the councils realise how much money they’re saving on traditional grit, they can send some to me!
